Pickin' the Bones

Dancin' for the Restless and the Broken Hearted

2005-08-19T04:15:00.000-07:00

Ahhh, Baltimore. Now I see why John Waters is so twisted - their Starbucks don't open until 7. Who can stay sane with swill like this hotel coffee? So, the flight was okay - on the flight to Phoenix, I didn't get stuck next to the fattest guy on the plane, but I did score the second fattest. Then, from Indy to Baltimore - a screeching kid. Ugh. Not to be elitist, but honestly! Can't they have seperate kid flights for families? Perhaps I'm still bitter about that @#$% winning the film contest with essentially home movies of kids, but REALLY!. And my dinner choices? Meat meat meat. WIth a side of meat. I get so tired of the lack of options in the hinterlands. Hie thee back to civilization! Speaking of civil ....

Faster Than The Speed of Anime
Ahhhh, Otakon. Only a few hours here and I am hiding in my hotel room. Comic fans are geek enuff - this is a whole new level. There is an air of desperation. If anime fans couldn't band, would these incredibly socially inept people be totally adrift on the streets? In the elevator (one of the only two that works - thanks Wyndham!) this lame guy made lame jokes and six people laughed like he was Joe Rogan. Argh. I shouldn't complain. They are paying me. Costing me more is ...

Fear of a Staph World
I forgot my hibiclens (my chlorhexidrine gluconate solution) antibac soap, so i had to buy some. After the airplane ride, the hotel gym and the general UNcleansed feeling emanating from the anime masses, I am terrified my staph will reactivate. Argh. Ah well. Two days and I'm in NYC with my honey. I still need to iron my clothes, too. Damn.

Today's Reading:
Finished Stealing Fire from the Gods, a new-agey kind of screenplay writing book, now almost done with Richard Walter's delightful The Whole Picture.

Today's Tune:
Afraid of a little drama? Don't be. It's all about Bonnie Tyler and "Faster Than The Speed of Night":

There really isn't any time to lose
We're going to lose it if we wait until it gets too light
You're such a pretty boy
Let me show you what to do, and you'll do it
But you gotta move faster
Faster than the speed of night

Faster than the speed of night
Faster than the speed of night
It's all we ever wanted
And all we'll ever need
And it's slipping through our fingers
Faster than the speed of night

Ohayo gozaimasu!

Which Act Am I In, Anyway?

2005-08-11T10:17:00.000-07:00

Now that I have studied and learned the power of the Three-Act Structure, I wonder which act I'm in - because increasingly, it feels like the end of Act Two, where the hero is at his lowest point, and all looks lost. I am extremely ready to move on to the sudden twist where the hero kicks ass and wins! Shawn must feel somewhat Act Twoish after the debacle last night - that woman (written with all scorn) won the Audi contest. How someone whose whole documentary premise was integrating parenting into your work, can make a film AND NOT BRING HER OWN KID!!!! OMG, its the height of hypocrasy. Shawn was much more gracious than I, saying it was a better film than he remembered, but honestly folks - it was pretty boring, unless you are a parent or straight and love to go all gaga over little kids' antics. What EVER. Flowing on to the next @#$%-up ...

Hard Out Here For A Pimp
I broke my car. After a fender bender, as I drove home the hood flew up and smashed my windshield into zillions of cracky pieces. Ugh! $$$$ hustling and flowing down the drain. I was so mad at myself, and it was just such a freakish and fukking scary moment. Ugh. Hustling onwards ...

Paradise Bound
Annie finished my song for Shawn! It was awesome! I have to say, it is a thrill to hear your words set to music. And Shawn was pretty touched, he said no one had ever written anything for him before. Well, if I have anything to say about, much more will be written for my homeboy. I'm so googlily in love it's kinda sick. Ahhh, well. I shall sing my way through this crappy Act Two, just like Ewan MacGregor in Moulin Rouge. Which is a good seque for ...

Today's Tune: From Queen, via Moulin Rouge

"Ooh! Inside my heart is breaking!
My make-up may be flaking!
But my smile, still, stays on!
Yeah! oh oh oh

I'll top the bill!
I'll overkill!
I have to find the will to carry on!
On with the,
On with the show!

The show must go on."

Today's Reading:

Norma Howe's Blue Avenger books rock!
Spy High, however, was dreck.

On with the show!

The Amazing All-Cookie Diet

2005-08-04T19:11:00.000-07:00

Okay. I'm not REALLY eating nada but cookies. But I think I could! Oh, the Trader Joe's Molasses Chews! Delectable! My goodness, they are something!. So, it's been uber hot, and I've been less than productive (Target AND Costco in two days - consumerism runs amuck) but back to writing. My YA book is taking shape, especially after a trip to the nifty keen Burbank library with Paul. Most of these books are abysmally written. Speaking of abysmal ...

End of Another Era
Trie leaves as our coach next week, back to the miserably cold wilds of Minneapolis. I will miss her, and the lessons i learned this year! I will never forget Rugby X-Games, the Trie dance (where you throw your clipboard on the ground and yell "Are you going to play rugby or softball out there? Get it done!") and the dirty dancing at every party. Ahhh, the Rebellion will never be the same! But change is good, as is ...

Difficult Personal Deductions
After Shawn and I had our first fight, and it was truly my fault for pushing my over-the-topness and juvenile behavior well past any human's tolerance, I had to step back and go - what the fuck AM i doing? How much have I hurt my personal, professional, emotional, social and all other lives - by going to the extreme ALL THE GD TIME, just to prove I am Mr. Extreme. I'm not 18 anymore. Why do I have a company called Bonehead Productions? Is it time for me, not to grow up (for the Peter Pan light in me is inextinguishable), but buy a fucking clue and see I don't have to be childish, but still remain childlike? And maybe quit flitting all over the board and focus?

Is this the difficult, most dire moment of Act Two, where I have to outwit the antagonist to claim the prize? And am I both the Pro and Ant-agonist?? How do I outwit myself?

Hmmmm.... stuff to think about while reading and studying ...

Today's Page Turners:
IRON MAN script - really quite good!. SPY HIGH - Mission one - Really quite lame! THE EYES OF KID MIDAS - quite smarmy writing style.

Today's Tunes:
Surprisingly, some mellow stuff -
Alan Parsons Project "I Robot" which has no lyrics to post here, and Annie Lennox's version "Waiting in Vain":

"Ya see, in life I know there's lots of grief,
But your love is my relief:
Tears in my eyes burn - tears in my eyes burn
While I'm waiting - while I'm waiting for my turn"

Wait your turn. Pax.

And ... We're Done!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-07-30T18:01:00.000-07:00

THANK GOD! Shawn cheated and ate peanuts today. We agreed this was a good test, but I don't feel a significant difference anymore - just weaker. So, we are having FOOD! I told him it would worry me if I was addicted to heroin and thought this much about smack. Oh my god I can't wait to eat. In fact, I have to quit this blogging and go eat some food! YAY!!!!!!!!

How To Be A Super Villain

2005-07-29T16:18:00.000-07:00

Obviously, post the spoilers on the new Harry Potter book on your blog! Paul and Shawn both castigated me (no, that's NOT a dirty word) for the last blog, so I will write a lot to make this scroll down the other! Yeesh! Would anyone have been this upset had I divulged the end of the latest Shopaholic novel??? A novel trip I took today was ...

Abs and Flinch
Really, being almost 40, I have no reason to go to this store, but I wanted some good shorts. Nope. I don't remember the last time I had a 28 inch waist, but when I did, I know I didn't have $79.00 for shorts. Back to Old Navy, for me! Back to the books as well ...

Front Facing
On Paul's very sound advice, I checked out which teen books are popular today. Not much for boys. Definitely a chick market. Boys play Playstation, not read. Ah, well. If it ain't Harry Potter or a Potter knock-off, it's all about the new, modern Hardy Boys. They say things like "Dad, you rock." I don't recall ever saying this to my dad, so, my apologies, Pop. I must have been too uncool. Cool enough in LA ...

Bat-Boy The Musical
Theres a new play I HAVE to see. www.plays411.com has the info on Bat-Boy. I love it. Also there's an exhibit on crochet models of the hyperbolic plane (http://www.theiff.org/oexhibits/05b.html for more info). I have to see this! Knitting up for the day then,

Day 5,437 of the Fast
While I feel energetic and skinny, and have been UBER productive, I want to just sit down and eat an entire pizza. Shawn bought THREE cookbooks and says all he really misses is the preparations. Good. Cause I miss the eating. Only 7 more pizza-less days to go ...

Today's tune
Learning to Fly from Pink Floyd ... a fave from college

"Into the distance, a ribbon of black
stretched to the point of no turning back
a flight of fancy on a wind swept field
standing alone my sense reeled
a fatal attraction holding me fast, how
can I escape this irresistable grasp?"

Today's reading

Ummm, brief glances of modern hardy Boys books? And old World's Finest comics ...

Shine on, you crazy diamonds

Tales of Crankiness and Irritation

2005-07-28T14:21:00.000-07:00

It's day three of this cleanse and I am in a foul fukkin mood. I'm not sure WHY ... oh wait. I HAVEN'T EATEN IN THREE DAYS. Depressed too. I just wnat to cozy up on my couch and read Harry Potter - oh wait I FINISHED IT last night. And if you haven't read it - DUMBLEDORE'S DEAD. Just like to shake it up a bit. No spoiler warnings on this blog. Speaking of Dumby ...

Snape - Good or Bad?
I couldn't tell ya. I'm LEANING towards good. D wouldn't have petrified Harry unless he KNEW what was gonna happen. And the whole theme of immortality through selfishness or love is pretty much carried through the whole 6 books. So, my guess is D is coming back and it was an order - not a plea for mercy - for Snape to curse him. We will see. You read it here first. Speaking of reading ...

Now What?
I'm back to my quantum physics texts. The World Within the World (the Snape Within the Snape?) is great but dense. And I'm too hungry and irritated to forge through it. Back issues of Dazzler or Marvel Super Action it is. Speaking of action ...

Oral Action
This is how sad my life is - the new Crest mouthwash and my coffee (neither of which taste even vaguely of the Master Cleanse pallette of lemon juice/syrup/cayenne pepper) are my daily highlights. God help me.

Today's Reading:

I just SAID I hadn't figured that out yet!

Today's Tunes:
TITANIC soundtrack. Never saw the flick, but I love James Horner and the Death of the Titanic music is cool. And no, I don't see ANY irony in choosing this tune ...

Angrily,
bone

Hunger of the Beast

2005-07-27T12:49:00.000-07:00

Day two of the cleanse. MUCH hungrier than last time. Of course, we were cheating a tiny bit and eating fruit then. But MY GOD, I am hungry. And you smell food everywhere. Fucking refrigerator has nothing but cherries, cheese and bread and I can smell that. Burned the mashed potato candle and wanted to gnaw on it, it smelled so much like popcorn! There's a Zone bar wrapper in the trash. Is it cheating to lick that? Licking some other things ...

High Sky
Great bike ride in Griffith Park yesterday. Wasn't tired at all, even up that 60-degree stretch of road going up Mt. Hollywood Road. I believe my body is generating more energy despite the lack of carbs and sugar. Now if it can just zap the staph bacteria. Its lasted longer than most of my relationships, as Suze kindly pointed out. Pointing out some other avenues ...

Protein pro tem
Would it be wrong to take some creatine or protein powder? It's not technically food, but even that might taste good right now.

Today's tune:
Augustus Gloop from the Charlie Soundtrack:

"Augustus Gloop,
Augustus Gloop,
The great big greedy nincompoop
Augustus Gloop,
so big and vile
so greedy foul and infantile!"

Still reading:

Harry. But on page 356!

Bah, Fool!

2005-07-26T16:10:00.000-07:00

Doom has little time for blogging these days! Now that Ku and I have said the "L" word, its been nonstop fun - despite his predilection for downloading Bryan Adams songs on MY computer. I'm tainted now! Speaking of tainted love ...

Staph Meeting
The doctor says I have the antibiotic-resistant staph, so I get to enjoy flare-ups for the REST OF MY LIFE! Apparently, if you get it, it changes and colonizes all your other, non-resistant staph bacteria into evil staph. I am not standing for this, and I am on a quest to reverse this mutation! Starting with the system-flushing ...

Master Cleanse
Ku and I are forgoing food for the lemon juice-maple syrup-cayenne pepper master cleanse. I'm hungry, but not overly so. BUt I know the pizza and cookie cravings will resurface soon. My hope is that not only will the cleanse
rid us of gross things, maybe the evil staph will be bored by my pure, purged self, and will vacate the colony, like humans fleeing the Cylons. Speaking of the deserted streets of Caprica ...

Media Obsessions of the Day
Battlestar Galactica continues to be amazing, as was Charlie and the Chocolate factory. Not so much for my beloved Fantastic Four -what a travesty. I better start working on the Secrets of Isis before anyone else does. I'm listening to the Charlie soundtrack now - "Willy Wonka/Willy Wonka/The amazing chocolatier" It's not QUITE the Oompa Loompa song, but damn catchy. Reminds me I need my own theme song. So with that:

Today's Lyrics:

From the CLASSIC B-52's song "Legal Tender":
Livin' simple and trying to get by
But honey, prices have shot through the sky
So I fixed up the basement with
What I was a-workin' with
Stocked it full of jelly jars
And heavy equipment
We're in the basement...
10-20-30 million dollars
Ready to be spent ..."

Today's Reading:

OOHHHH! New Harry Potter! MUCHO better than Order of the Phoenix!

Pax out, G.

Man the Best

2005-06-23T05:54:00.000-07:00

Happily Ever After
Dave & Lili's wedding was great. I have to say, the part where the preacher asked the assembled people to ALSO support the couple, really struck me. Of course, I thought. THAT is why marriages are ceremonial. To solidify things. To make them real. And ask for the community's support in keeping it real. So, I pledged that. Dave and Lili will always have my support (as will Phil & Kim, Mel & Jeff all my married and committed friends), not just as a friend, but as someone invested in keeping their part of our community strong. Cheesy-sounding, I know. But I love them, and I want it to always stay strong, and want the same for me and others in my life. I was worried a lot about the speech (what if I HAD done a PowerPoint?) but it seemed to go okay. As far as the rest of the night, Foosh and I (Courtney & Roman's 2-year-old) had a blast playing with the fake rings that lit up- he was the "ringbear" and I the Best Man. What a great time. I just mainly was surprised at how fun it was to hang with Foosh. Well, no one else was surprised. My mental level is that of a 2-year-old (or a 13-year-old girl, depending on the circumstance). I never wanted kids, but I would be an amazing dad. Well ... at the very least the kid would have an amazing comic book collection. And, from the annals of my OWN secret origin ...

Wet Asphalt and Cut Grass
NC smells better than LA. I am at Starbucks outside after last night's rain, and they are cutting the grass. At this moment, aside from my boyfriend and my friends, I do not miss LA. Oh, and Grace. I don't miss being on a plane. The trip -ugh. LA-SF, SF-CHI, CHI-RDU -and two of the flights on the tiniest non-puddle-jumpers imaginable. Very cranky the whole trip, ate dinner at Gate 80 in SF, called Fran ... I have to admit, my feelings for a certain someone are stronger than even I suspected. But then, I did spend my last night in LA scrubbing his bathroom and steam cleaning his carpet. What on Earth has happened to me???? Am I moving into "like-plus?" And now, do I have to deal with it???? Dealing with other issues ...

Fireflies
While I diss this state, NC does boast an abundance of lightning bugs. I love that. It thunderstormed last night, and then at dusk ... fireflies. Bioluminesence always fascinated me. And at 12:30 at night, as I talked to Shawn on the phone, I saw them again. Sign? Portent? Mating ritual of bugs that remains totally unconnected to my life drama???? Other drama in the making ...

Many Happy Returns
How surprised will mom be that the drapes are put up and she has a new screen door. I need to head back home and see her face!

Today's Reading - Another John Barrow scientific tome, The World Within The World. I love his exploration of not just WHAT we think, but HOW we think. Its very soothing, in an academacian kind of way.

Today's Song:

Oh, I have been re-listening to Annie Lennox's first CD. So ... Little Bird it is
"They always said that you knew best but
This little bird's fallen out of that nest now
I've got a feeling that it might have been blessed so
I've just got to put these wings to test"

More later!

Cucking Funt!

2005-06-16T18:31:00.000-07:00

I HATE my passive aggressive neighbor. She has pissed me off again by leaving a note on the door. "Would it be possible for you to turn down whatever's making that loud bass noise after 11pm?" Well, if I HAD a "loud, bass noise" making machine, I'd only turn it up, you bitch. The fact of the matter is, she won't knock on the door to ask me PLUS, I've been at Shawn's the last week every night except last night, and she claims it's been "days." I knocked on her door, but she NEVER answers. I left her a note saying it could ONLY be the TV, and I'd been gone the last week. She's a cunt, and I HATE her. Why does this piss me off so much? I don't know and don't care. It's a Los Angeles apartment, baby. Deal with it Another thing to deal with ...

Anime-niac
Ah, working for Geneon again. Crazy. You truly NEVER know what's going to happen. I'm actually petty excited, its a project manager thing for the Para-para max contest at Otakon, and I hope this time we get it to take off and be the success I know it could be. Para-para dancing is so awesomely cheesy, and I LOVE that, so cross fingers. Another cross to bear ...

Hello, Dollywood!
Not only does my Dolly cover CD not play in my iTunes, the PR guy from Dollywood is not calling me back. Ugh! Come on! My gay vibes should attract Dolly-ness, non? Je ne compres pas. Aussi ...

"I object!"
Our chick flick night got turned into a political discussion. Ah, well. Personal responsibility was the topic, and it is distressingly sad that so little of gay culture (much less the ubiquitously propagating straight culture) has so little personal responsibility. Even the spam I get, tantalising me with sweet young virgin girls, is so dumbly irresponsibly aimed (come on -what straight porn sites do I visit????) is symptomatic. Good grief.

Today's Reading:

Embarassingly, I've been reading old Dazzler issues. And, Zylpha Keatly Snyder's Black and Blue Magic, one of my fave children's books!

Today's Song:
"Walls Come Tumbling Down" By The Style Council. Always an anthemic uplift for me. I'll turn it up so the cunt next door (CND) can hear every lyric!!!!

"Are you gonna try an’ make this work
Or spend your days down in the dirt -
You see things can change -
Yes an’ walls can come tumbling down!"

Pax

Blinded by the Justice

2005-06-13T14:05:00.000-07:00

Im IM'ing with Jose and Ann, texting Shawn, and yahoo webcasting and getting speakerphone audio from Suze's office since Safari is not supporting Yahoo audio. Is Michael jackson guilty? Who cares. I just want this stuff done.

Paul's party was fun yesterday, great to see Hahni and Pam after so long. I promised to blog it - here it is!

I've been slack about the blogs lately. Ehn. Well. Been busy.

Not really psyched about my trip home. I'll be missing a big Godzilla/Ultraman film fets here. Damn it.

So - got a WGA invote to a BATMAN screening tomorrow. I can't wait!

So what else can I say. Sent writing samples to DC Comics. Did a script for Geneon, breakfast with an ex-Power Ranger. I do have a cool life.

The judge has the verdict ... they are dragging this the fuck out.

What do I think? He may not have done THIS, but I suspect he did SOMETHING. But as I never got an invite to Neverland, how would I know.

The verdict is ...
not guilty. UGH. What a letdown.

More later.

Ozmopolitan

2005-05-24T20:00:00.000-07:00

Shawn got us tix for Wicked, which I was a little apprehensive about. After the Movin' On and Mamma Mia debacles, I'm a little afeared of B-way stuff. But this rocked! And the singers! Holy crap! I'm sitting all big and pretty, thinking I did good at my recital. Huh. "Humble pie, serving of one." Ah, well. Amazing. Truly amazing. The last song of the first act gave me chills. Chills of another kind came today when ...

Here I Go '80s Again
Watched them film the musical end sequence for Shawn's doc. It was awesome, so 1980s MTV! The only bad thing was it was under the Brooklyn Bridge near the river and MIGHTY chilly. Ugh! Still - I wouldn't have missed it for the world. It's fun to see him in work mode and performance mode. Another mode of transportation I love is ...

My Own Metro Card
I love the subway. You see and hear great shit on the NYC subway. This cute toddler was reading a Bazooka bubble gum comic out loud to passengers- well, screaming "Oooo! OOOO!" really. But I think in baby talk it meant "These jokes are more stale than the gum!" I could have bought a bootleg "digital quality" DVD of Revenge of the Sith for $5 today. STILL not worth my $ or time. Time better spent on ...

My Favorite Time Lord
The new DOCTOR WHO kicks more ass than ANYTHING - maybe even Farscape. Sacrilege, I know. So. That's it for now.

Today's Reading:
More "Walking in the World" and articles in the Wicked playbill.

Today's Song:
Defying Gravity ... from Wicked, of course!

"And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who'd ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am
Defying gravity
I'm flying high
Defying gravity"

Peace and more later.

Ridin' the Bull

2005-05-23T16:07:00.000-07:00

So, my recital is over. It went pretty good, I think. Everyone was very complimentary, and I think I surprised everybody that I actually CAN sing. It feels a bit weird to say that, especially after so much karaoke, but I HAVE been taking lessons and practicing for 8 months.

It was weird warming up with other people backstage. I'm used to making my duck quacks and "mums" "na-ni-na"s in front of Maggie, but to hear 12 people doing it ... it felt cool. I wish I had been in choir or something. And, the whole thing has shifted some stuff inside of me. I've been re-reading Walking In The World, the sequel to The Artist's Way, and I have taken on this growing new creative identity and its uncomfortable and doesn't fit well - yet. But I want to sing. A lot. "Writers Gone Wild! - now on DVD!" But it's true. The inexpressable feeling of your voice surfing up and down, feeling the attention of the audience and hopefully taking them with you through the story - potent, potent stuff. Like nearly scoring a try or tacking those Marines, it seems almost too improbably. But then, who'd a thunk I'd end up loving country music - or that we'd have something called "hick-hop" ...

CBT on the MP3
I gotta shout out - props to Cowboy Troy. It was only a matter of time before we had country rap. Between him, Big & Rich and Gretchen Wilson, the country spectrum exploded exponentially in 12 months. Check out "I Play Chicken With The Train." Can Gay Country be far behind? " Jumping on another track ...

Center of Gravity
Riding the mechanical bull is NOT as easy as it looks and they didn't keep it on the "girl" setting for me, despite my protestations that I am a 13-year-old girl in a 39-year-old rugby player's body. My thighs were sore for an hour. With Shawn out of town for so long, my bronc riding muscles are out of shape. But this cowboy is now urban ...

The Only John Wayne Left In This Town
I flew into NYC this AM. Couldn't sleep on the red-eye, I was in the center seat and this rude woman kept kicking me or putting her paper over my DirectTV controls. Oh, well. Shawn's been busy shooting, and I had to get a Pokemon web profile done, but then I walked to a comic book store in mid-town. On the way, I saw four strings of balloons (like they have decorating car lots) floating up over the Westin Hotel. They looked like broken words against the gray papery sky. I deliberately slowed down to enjoy it and people like to almost run me over. Shawn is right, Yankees are so much rude, as they are just all involved in the big Manhattan dance, and if you don't know the steps, you're going to get your feet stepped on. Ah well. When he gets back to the room, we will be dancing off to dinner with Shadow Lass, his best friend here. Hope I make a good impression.

Today's Reading:
Walking In The World, by Julia Cameron, I said that already. And also, I found a newsstand here that carried Rugby World, so that's cool.

Today's Song:
SHeDAISY's "Don't Worry Bout A Thing"

"Life is sticky
Life can bruise
Sometimes you win,
sometimes you're losing
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'bout a thing..."

So I won't. More later.

Cruise Directors Gone Wild - Season Finale!!!

2005-05-10T22:33:00.000-07:00

So, it's all over for the Rebellion's Offical 2K5 Season. I'm beat, and its a big part of why I ain't blogged in soooo long. The blurry highlights of this month include Trie making us play Rugby Dodgeball and Rugby Freeze tag at our last Thursday practice, the trip to Phoenix with Shawny Shawn and singing dirty Air Supply songs on the way back, getting staph again and going on major antibiotics (not a highlight, butto be noted), helped Dave and Lili move and having a big slumber party with the boys during the Magnitude 15.0 tourney in Seattle. Rick, Ruel and Ish and I read Tiger Beat, ate pizza, had a pillow fight and flirted with boys proving once and for all we are the 13-year-olds of the team.

Now I'm planning Rossi's Kryptonian Bachelor Party and the Rebellion Banquet. Sheesh! I need some help on the Lido Deck!

Just got home from another viewing of Kung Fu Hustle with Suze. I REALLY have to start practicing my rugby fu and my writing fu - but for now, I just downloaded the first four NEW Doctor Whos and I can't wait to check them out. Plus, I am so upset over Paula Abdul's trials and tribulations, I need to relax!

Today's Reading:
Over the last month, most of the Dragonriders of Pern books, finished up All The Weyrs of Pern today. And old Grant Morrison Doom Patrol comics, and the TBP of Zatanna's Quest. Tnaillirb!!!

Today's song:
Tim McGraw's "Live Like You Were Dying"

"Sky divin',
I went rocky mountain climbin',
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull name Fu Manchu.
And I loved deeper,
And I spoke sweeter,
And I watched an eagle as it was flyin'.
And he said someday I hope you get the chance,
To live like you were dyin' ..."

Potent words. More later.

A Moment of Unending Fractal Peace

2005-04-06T22:35:00.000-07:00

5:39 p.m. I'm on Shawn's front porch waiting for him to show up for dinner. I've driven all over LA today. The Exec Board wants to do ANOTHER fundraiser in 2 weeks. I've got calls to make for Nintendo. I've got pages to write. A 7 a.m. meeting. Comics to sort for Paul's yard sale. I'm tired and cranky and don't want to go to practice. I lay down on the wooden bench on his porch and look up ...

The sky is the perfect brilliant blue of that Gus Van Sant movie where River Phoenix would fall asleep on the highway. The giant pine branches wave slowly up and down in the gentlest of breezes, undulating between shade and stark sunlight. Five parallel bars of sunlight stripe the wooden column of his porch. I begin to count the tiniest branches, and notice they really do mirror the pattern of the larger branches - five-five five, all curled just slightly like an arthritic hand.

If I never scored a try, never got laid again, never got my books published, never got another thing I wanted in my life - or if I did become so rich and powerful I could produce a new ISIS show, could have a replica of the Hall of Justice built in my back yard, got superpowers, taught Gracie to talk, got Fran to move to LA - those branches would STILL wave in the twilight sun, wave from their macroscopic branches to their green needles to their cellular strands ... and it would all be fucking fine.

I've never been so glad someone was five minutes late.

Today's reading:
John Byrne's Alpha Flight - ah the glory days of unobstructed Bryne! Aurora and Northstar, Snowbird and Marinna! What awesome issues!

Today's song:
From Vanessa Carlton's Ordinary Day

"He said
Take my hand
Live while you can
Don't you feel the dreams are right in the palm of your hand..."

I love that. "Live while you can." I wish it for everyone in my life.

Peace everybody. More later.

The Only Gay Bar in Antarctica

2005-03-31T08:28:00.000-08:00

Jano from the San Diego Armada called and asked me to take a friend of his out who was staying in LA for the night, so I did. Eden was from New Zealand and so after the House of Pi event, Shawn and I took him to MJ's. Eden met Jano while they were both in Antarctica (so now, amazingly enough, I know TWO people on the planet who have been there!) and Shawn said jokingly that there probably weren't any gay bars in Anarctica and Eden said, "Just Jano's bedroom."

That cracked me up. Unlike ...

"Da tattoo! Da tattoo!"
Paul, Rossi and Suze thought it would be terribly funny to tell Shawn how I passed out twice getting my tattoo. Now, it's an undeniable fact that it happened. While I'm not terribly PROUD of the fact I passed out, the worst part is, Shawn's quite clever and he likes to hold things over my head, like a giant water-balloon filled with rotten mayonaise, which he did all night. But don't worry ...

"Revenge is a dish best served cold. It is very cold in space."
After another viewing of "What the Bleep?" I am working very hard on restructuring my beliefs. Sooner than you know it, I will have a book deal, a movie option, richer than God (though you could argue God has no money, because what actually is God going to purchase?) my own reality show (though it may be a more quantumized version, starring the subatomic foam versions of my atoms) be hanging out at trendy bars with Lindsay Lohan, and suing my friends for selling that tattoo story to the Star. So there. Just some of the idle thoughts I think about. but I haven't BEEN idle this week. Almost too busy to blog, what with the ...

"Brother can you spare a grand?"
Everything went well with the Rebellion fundraiser Saturday night except the bachleor auctions. Nobody wanted to shell out any cash for dates with us. Hmmmm....I hardly like to contemplate what that means. Ish and I had fun go-go dancing (we are naughty little 13-year-olds at heart), but I'm pretty done with that little fantasy. After 15 minutes, it gets boring. Ann and Shawn were the only ones who came to the event, so everyone else will have to run laps. Lapping up some attention this week ...

Picasso's Therapist
Dave and Lili brought Picasso over while their apartment got inspected. After a hissing fit where Grace retreated to the sofa, and Picasso to under the bed, there they stayed for about 28 hours. Poor Picasso. He'll need extensive therapy, I think.

Today's Reading
The SHADE mini-series. You have to love a comic book based on an immortal super-villain's journal. Also, finished Paulie's RAINBOW PARTY, on sale in June. I know a real author!!! RP was prettty damn enjoyable, so rush out to the young adult section of your local bookstore (or go here- http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/141690235X/qid=1112794409/sr=2-1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/103-0325930-1649415), buy it and get your autographed copy now, before he goes on Oprah and gets too famous to speak to us anymore!

Today's Song:
A little Mase for ya -

"Favor, people wanna pay for me
When I'm in Mr. Chows, they waive the fee
And I don't chase money man
Money chase me ..."

More Later

The Price of Stupidity -$26.00

2005-03-29T17:43:00.000-08:00

Actually, it's more of a sliding scale. I parked in Venice without bothering to even LOOK at the sign, so my price was $35. Suze set her alarm for 5 PM and thus was made late for work, had to go print out a 26-page presentation at Kinko's for $26 bucks, thus her price. Some people do things that cost them jobs, boyfriends or self-respect, so I feel our prices are budgetable - for the nonce. Speaking of words (or in words, as opposed to tongues) ...

Wordy Rappinghood
I'm at the initial and fun stages of revisions with the book. Namely, I'm prepping a query letter and outline. I love making up chapter titles and I have some luminous ones so far. I adore my Webster's Unabridged and one day I will own an OED. It is afternoons like this that make me glad I live this writing life. Life wasn't so rosy this am, but then I got a cheery email from my fave ...

Butt Pirate of the Carribbean
Ernst is moving on to Dominica on the 4th. Yeesh! What fun to be an island hopper, but it sounds like he is working 24/7. Poor Ernsty. I miss him! But things are cheery here - DTC has new work for me and tonight -at long last ...

House of π!
Yes, we are finally celebrating 3.14 (get it?) Pi Day (and the natal anniversary of Einstein!). I can't wait. I need to go find those pi songs online, though I doubt seriously we will sing. However, a songstress I miss just interrupted me mid-blog ...

Recepriblogging
Ann had a hellacious time moving, you can click just over there to read her Cosmic Girl blog (and see her web portfolio - hire her she's amazing). I am all done with this post except for ...

Today's Reading:
Finishing up Pi in the Sky. I hate to leave it, it has made me so much smarter, but I have new John Barrow books to peruse. Still - this has opened my math mind in unexpected ways.

Today's Song:
Irene Cara's (talk about overlooked 80's pop stars) awesome but underrated theme song from D.C. Cab - The Dream. When I get the Pulitzer Prize for Literarture, i'm gonna bust out and start singing this as my acceptance speech:

"I've been chasing dreams for so long
Just one step behind, then they're gone
Illusions of love would come and go
I guess you have to hurt before you grow
And everybody knows
never let go of the ...
never let go of the dream!"

More later.

Man of the Match in a Field of Butterflies

2005-03-28T10:28:00.000-08:00

I got named Man of The Match! How effing cool is that? Adam and I (the two flankers) both got it. For those of you who haven't come out yet to see me play, MOTM is given out to the player(s) who do the best in the game. In all honesty, I remember so little of the games I play - it's all this big blur, but I do remember a few good tackles, and holding one guy up, inches from the try line. So yay me! It was an awesome sunny Saturday for rugby, and I had so many people come out - Shawn (bless his heart) stayed ALL FRIGGING DAY from field set-up to the third half. Rossi and Lili, Liz and Alex, Paulie, Phyllis and Sylvia - all came out to see us play. Thanks guys and gals!

Aside from MOTM, I had an extraordinary moment. See, the forest behind the field let loose thousands of newborn monarch butterflies the whole afternoon. A swarm of tiny orange and black (our Rebellion colors, how wacky is that?) butterflies hovering and flitting above the violent ballet of rugby taking place on the Eagle Rock field. Even as I was pretty near breathless and huffing spit through my mouthguard, it was a sight of stunning beauty - for a moment, everything froze and I was happier than i'd been in a long, long time. Speaking of happy ...

Happy Bloggin' Easter
I was too tired yesterday to blog, but it was a fun Easter Brunch with Suze and Paulie. We went to Marguerite's in Venice and then Paul took off to his sister's and Suze and I walked down Freak Boulevard and bought new outfits. I got a parking ticket which led me into a Venice rant. I got a ticket the first day I lived there, and obviously, Venice doesn't want me back. Fine, you fucking freak town. I hate Chicago, I hate San Francisco and I hate hate hate Venice. So I came back to my nice cozy BoneCave in Silverlake where ...

With One Magic Word
It occurs to me that after watching What the Bleep? I am trying to find the words or equations that can alter belief (which in turn can alter reality). This is a harder magic than one supposes. I find I STILL believe so much negative crap, stereotypes about money, sex, cities that hate me, other people, digital watches ... that my core beliefs are not changing fast enough to support the reality I live in (or want to live in, where I am one stupidly rich motherfucker). I am still stuck. My progress is not what I'd prefer, in terms of financial or publishing success. Baby steps, I know. But STILL!!!! Shazam? (Have to keep testing, you never know). So, with that in mind, my playlists are a bit more about dreams. To wit ...

There's A Song In My Heart
Lily Tomlin is coming to the Alex Theater with the Gay Men's Chorus this weekend - THAT I want to see. And in a rugby-related stretch, Gladys Knight is coming in June. Whew! Plus our fundraiser Saturday night. I am one busy bonehead.

Today's Reading:
Just Yahoo! News and my Free Will Astrology Horoscope.

Today's Song:
Holding Out For A Hero (the Shrek 2 version by Jennifer Saunders - brilliant!)

"Up where the mountains meet the heavens above
Out where the lightning splits the sea
I could swear there is someone, somewhere watching me
Through the wind and the chill and the rain
and the storm and the flood
I can feel his approach like a fire in my blood
(like a fire in my blood/like a fire in my blood
like a fire in my blood/like a fire in my blood!)"

More later.

--30--!!!!!!!!

2005-03-25T17:25:00.000-08:00

I FINISHED THE BOOK YESTERDAY!

Of course, I have much proffing (see?), editing and revisions, but how satisfying to slap a 30 on that (for those not conversant with old school journalism, --30-- signifed the "end of story").

My second novel. And this only took, ohhh, let's see - summer of 2000, so - 5 years, one divorce, two moves, three mid-life crises (and counting) and a couple funerals to get through. But I did it! Yay for me!

As much as sci-fi and stuff are my preference, I'm glad a did a "real-life" product (as in "cheese product" or 10% juice product.") Of course, much is autobiographical, but it's interesting how Raleigh took on a life of his own, and made better decisions than I ever did. Now I need to set a timeline for cleaning it up and getting it out in front of some publishers. But this weekend - it's rugby time! Speaking of the drinking team with a rugby problem ...

In Your Satin Tights
Everybody at practiced laughed when I said what I was going to do to get ready for tomorrow's game was going to be to watch the Second Season DVD of Wonder Woman. They will not laugh when I kick some Amazon ass on those OC Bucks! Brutal practice last night, and it was great to see Ish (my darling Vicki!) back at practice. We were all a little rusty on the back line stuff, but we pulled it together. So, I was surprised this morning when ...

"It's back. Our kung-fu is back."
Not so much. My Shaolin Soccer DVD was lost in the mail, so now I have to get another one! Dmamit! How I can charge myself up with rugby-fu when I don't have my spiritual guide???? Speaking of spirit guides ...

Crack Whore of the Day
Whitney, back in rehab again!!!!!!!! I tell ya, I know she's lost it, and may never recover, but she had many, many moments of audio brilliance. I guess it answers my unasked question, do these pop stars even LISTEN to their own lyrics? If so, wouldn't they take some of the same comforts we mere mortals take from lines like "It's not right/but it's okay/I'm gonna make it anyway/close the door behind you/leave your key/I'd rather be alone than unhappy"???? So in honor of Her Crackness (and the ailing Complain-A-Lot lass) ...

Today's Song:
"I put myself aside to do it your way
But now I need to do it all alone
And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what, I'll keep it real
Time for me to do it on my own"

Today's Reading:
Wizard Magazine's Hollywood issue. Fanboy geekness. 'nuff said.

Shout outs to Phil for acquiring the Exclusive Dark Phoenix Heroclix for me, and Kim for the Nike swag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

More later.

Absolute Value

2005-03-24T12:16:00.000-08:00

So, in reading through these math texts (and how would old Mrs. Pechal laugh to think of me, who HATED algebra, reading voraciously on these math philosophy books!) i stumbled across the concept of absolute value. It means the value of the number in terms of how far away from zero it is, regardless of it being positive or negative. |5| = |-5|, period.

So, in the midst of being positive or negative in attitude, our absolute value doesn't change.

And perhaps THAT will get me through the next time I get sucked into an emotional black hole.

Practice was good last night, though Victor chewed me out for overrunning and not being in support. Too slow, too fast - I'm never right enough for him. Perhaps I should use the absolute value argument with him.

Apprently Fat Actress the other night had her looking for the BatCave in Griffith Park - echoing me and Shawn's trek last week. Is she stalking me?

Today's Reading:
Old Walt Simonson issues of THOR. OMG, those were epic. Simonson had such a grasp on blending Norse mythology with the Marvel universe. I was never a huge Thor fan until those issues.

Today's Song:
Trisha Yearwood has been on my mind and larynx the last few days, and while it's "How Do I LIve" I've been singing, a better song lyrically is "I Would've Love You Anyway":

"Even if I'd seen it comin'
You'd still have seen me runnin'
Straight into your arms

I would've loved you anyway
I'd do it all the same
Not a second I would change
Not a touch that I would trade
Had I known my heart would break
I would've loved you anyway ..."

Perhaps that encapsulates the absolute value of love. Now if I can just work out the geometry of dreams ...

More later